Rule 7: BE THE LAST TO RAISE YOUR VOICE
For me this is really a hard one, I do love to have a good shout. Sometimes I did get my own way but the reality is that it is a bad thing and deep down I'm quite ashamed of myself.
There are so many things that make us shout, so many situations where we feel that a judicious loss of temper will get us our own way. But we are dealing with real life human beings who have their own feelings and shouting is not justified, even if they are the first.
There are two situations where people loose their temper, Justified and Manipulative. The first is when you step on a person's foot and refuse to apologize or acknowledged you have done something wrong, they are allowed to yell. The second is when people use anger to get their way- a sort of emotional blackmail, you are allowed to ignore them or be assertive to control situation. You are not allowed to yell back.
I know there are some situations where yelling seems to be the best option; the dog is stealing your meat, the kids won't tidy their room, your computer has crashed and the engineer won't fix it quickly enough, someone is clearly stupid and deliberately choosing to misunderstand you.
So what do you do if you have also this same yelling habit like me? I find out that I just have to walk away to stop the inevitable decline into yelling in a challenging situation, tough one especially if you know you are right. But if you take this rule as simple " I don't yell", it becomes an easy benchmark to stick to, you get known as someone who is incredibly calm no matter what, and "one of the best lessons we can learn in life is to master how to remain calm" -( Catherine Pulsifer 1984) .Calm people get trusted ; Calm people get relied on; Calm people get looked up to and given responsibilities; Calm people last longer folks!
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